Afraid of Your Feelings? + Embracing Your Gift
- May 01, 2024
- By Samantha Nevarez
- In Orly Levy Life Coach Support
Since I was a child, I felt a deep sense of empathy for others. I could sense another person’s sadness, fears or confusion and could easily put myself in their shoes in order to understand and support them.
This is the gift of sensitivity and empathy. We are hyper-aware of feelings and energy floating around and then can use our open hearts to love, listen and heal others.
Though this is a gift, it doesn’t come with an instruction manual. It easy to get confused and even lost in our sensitivity. We might take on other people’s pain and believe it is our own. Rather than express this energy, it may stay stuck in our system. Or we might judge our sensitive nature by comparing our emotional state to another person who is not at all emotional. This may leave us swirling in comparison and pain because we are different.
Some of us may have never acknowledged our sensitivity or deep feelings until an experience arose that created so much pain and suffering that we were forced to tend to our needs. Other times, it is not our own pain but that of a loved one that awakens and stirs deep rooted emotions within us. In the moment, this may all feel horrible. When things feel horrible, we tend to make them wrong or bad.
All these reasons lead us to stifle our gifts and reject our sensitivity which keeps us stuck in pain. When we reject a piece of ourselves, our entire body feels it. This leads to a disconnection in our system. A tangled wire that can only be untangled by learning about our unique system and healing all the confusion we have around ourselves.
A gift can only be given if it is perceived as a gift. This is difficult when our sensitivity may leave us feeling more then our nervous systems can handle. The most important part of this gift is YOU. Your system needs more nurturing, more care, more love than ever.
When we shine a light on a piece of ourselves that has been in the dark, we give it the opportunity to grow, shift and change. Our capacity for feeling, connection and experiencing a happier life grows. Just like everything in nature, we need nourishment in order to heal and grow. This is only possible with attention, acknowledgment, tools and awareness of our inner most being.
So where do we begin? The first thing we can do is acknowledge that there is a feeling within us that is asking to be noticed. Its like a quiet voice that’s shouts are muffled – some people describe it as a pinch or an emptiness. Something feels off, not right, but we can’t put our finger on it.
GET CURIOUS – the problem with this is that we jump from 1 to 10 defining and prescribing what is wrong with us. I am asking you to PAUSE before that. Stay with the curiosity that something feels off in your system. Pause and release the labels and ideas the mind is going to feed you about why, when and how.
SIT WITH IT – relax your body with breathing, meditation, yoga, exercise, a warm bath. Usually, this part is most difficult. We don’t want to feel what is there because it scares us.
Though, “the only way out is through.” Ill remind you that you don’t need to do this alone, you can ask for support or contact me here.
Do you notice any sensations in your body, do you notice any emotion, do you notice the voice of judgment, anger or blame? If so, you are on the right track – these are all very normal and very acceptable. And our goal is to ALLOW IT TO BE THERE. Remind yourself that you are safe and that the emotion will pass. Be loving and gentle with yourself. You will feel a shift once some movement or emotion has moved.
None of it is YOU at your core. You are the witnesser, the experiencer of all this. You will not get lost in it because there is a bigger YOU, witnessing it all. I deeply hope this supports you in some way. Feel free to share your thoughts or questions with me.
Love and Light,
Orly