Stop Being Patient
At my daughter’s soccer game, the parents sitting on the sidelines began to chat about children and patience. I have always struggled with patience. I once read in a numerology book based on my birthday that “I often wait for my ship to come in before it’s even taken sail.”
As if being steps ahead in my mind would accomplish something for me. We all know, it does not. The truth of this stayed with me so naturally, my ears perked up at the conversation on the sidelines.
The woman said, “I read somewhere that patience is really prolonged suffering because why would you “need to be patient” if you weren’t viewing whatever it was as a struggle.
Whoa – that was a powerful message! Yes, why would I need to be patient about anything if I wasn’t avoiding something about the present moment? OR viewing it in a way that led to suffering.
“Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it.” Eckhart Tolle
For instance, since the topic was parenting our children and patience, what if whining was not viewed through the lens of judgment? What if whining was whining – something kids and adults do at times when feeling agitated, tired, hungry, etc.
Then would I need patience to deal with the whining or would acceptance lead me to bypass patience?
I am not saying that whining doesn’t get annoying and we need to love and think it is so cute. I am asking, if there was more acceptance and less avoidance of uncomfortable life experiences such as whining, not sleeping, financial stress, or even job loss; would we need to be patient?
Why not stop trying to be patient and start getting comfortable with the discomfort that is uncertainty? Instead of being patient or waiting for the deal to come through or the child to stop whining find and focus on allowing things to be as they are and not as you decided they should be.
If you, like me are waiting at the harbor for the ship to come in, turn around and walk back to the ice cream shop on the corner or the kite shop on the beach. Don’t prolong your suffering with patience any longer, shift your focus and allow it be instead.
Questions to Consider:
- Is patience really prolonged suffering?
- Can I be less patient and more accepting?
- Are patience and acceptance the same thing?
With love and light,
Orly
